Wednesday, April 02, 2008

Sad


I took Hannah to the audiologist this morning - her hearing is worse than last time. Looks like ear tubes are a definite - her ENT was on leave - he is back next week so I have to ring first thing as the audiologist seemed to think that he would want to squeeze us in next Friday if he can. Doesn't sound good does it? When I got back to the car I cried. I feel like a goose - it is NOTHING like the AVSD repair - logically I know that but I have this numb, sickening feeling of dread, it is out of all proportion to what will probably happen to Han but there it is... I can't help it. All I can see is her lying on the bed in PICU after last time - looking so bloated and so glassy eyed, totally unlike my beautiful baby. I never took photoes - I couldn't bear it - now I wish I had because maybe I could have de sensatised myself to the experience a bit or at least put it in perspective!!

I have been looking up Dr Google - and the forums - one mum described the procedure as a 'speed bump' in her day. Oh well - needs must - so let's get ready to JUMP!

5 comments:

Cate said...

Abby just got ear tubes last week. She's fine, it was definitely harder for me than for her. It's always scary when your kid has to have something done. (And I'd think even more so, once you've been through something like the AVSD.) You're definitely not a goose! It would be more strange if you weren't nervous.

Anyway, fingers crossed that you get in soon, get it over with, and everything goes smoothly.

~Melissa~ said...

I'm sorry that she has to get tubs. I bet that she will handle it wonderfully! I can understand that you would feel nervous though. Hang in there!

Michelle said...

hugs to you! I know just how you feel; I felt like that each of the 4 times Kayla has had tubes! It really is a quick procedure and they are out before you know it!

jotcr2 said...

I completely understand you dreading the procedure. We haven't had tubes yet, but have had our fair share of other GA's for various reasons and it usually takes me a week of restless nights before hand, then a week to get over it.

Tommy's mommy said...

I'm sorry to hear Hannah needs tubes. Tommy got his placed last October and he could *finally* hear! It was so much better than any other surgeries we had been thru, rest assured.

Shelly, I can't tell you how much of a difference they make. Truely. Hang in there, you are such an amazing mommy!