parties

Hannah has two best friends at school - a little girl and this young fellow - he's funny and smart and crazy and spirited and caring - what's not to love? Love you Mr Z!
Two very beautiful little boys...
Some great kids. We were very fortunate in the mix of kindy kids we found at our local school. They are just a great bunch of kids in their own right and for us, in embarking on the 'mainstream journey' these little people and their families have been fantastic - couldn't have asked for better...
I's mum says she managed to get a photo of the three kids...
a sliding brat....

Feb - midreport

Swimming again. Kit was allowed back in the water now his stitches have been removed. They had a blast.


Lots of bits and pieces have been happening but nothing in particular - so here is a random catch up of the days of our lives... With the arrival of all the electronic games it seemed as if Kit would never draw again.... so I bought some bath crayons and he agreed to not play electronic games Tues - Thurs - and voila! A drawing of Ben 10 aliens... I love having my 'boy' back.

A Valentines card for Hannah from her friend Z
Kit has been practising his keyboard regularly with less fuss so that is nice:
Hannah has been enjoying drawing and writing. This morning she didn't want to practice her spelling words but was happy to write out the names of everyone in her family. Speech wise she is doing great too - I can't remember what I had done but yesterday when I said 'no' she went straight to her father and basically said 'make Mummy say yes' the little bugger! Then after getting two teeth extracted I was driving her home - I asked if she wanted her ipod and when she said no I suggested she and I just listen to a cd. I found one already loaded - the Hillbillies which Kit likes but Hannah clearly didn't want it - she signed 'shut door' and from that I worked out she wanted 'Rattlin' Bones' by Kasey Chambers - and so she and I sang along to it on the way home.

I have finally organised for Hannah to have orthotics (again) I am trying a place a bit closer to home hoping it will keep me more vigilant as she really needs some support her arches are really fallen in. Unfortunately this is the only health professional that she doesn't cooperate with! Today at the dentist - she was great. When I take her to the drs - it's the same - she works hard to understand what they want her to do - and then she gives it a go. Not so the podiatrist. It's because he tried to take a footprint to custom cast an orthotic - and the machine scared her. Now she is wary of anything about him - so he ordered in a foam box to use as a mould - no way was she putting her feet in it (even though she has done this before at the old gait clinic) so in the end we went with off the shelf, slightly modified ones. She was happy because they are red and once he'd snuck them into her shoes and she realised that they were ok she was eager to show them to dad and grandpa. Outside waiting to pay was so lovely - I was letting her know that I'd take a photo of them so Grandpa could see them (Dad is in Brisbane at the moment) and put it on my computer - to which she said "Hannah missing Grandpa". How lovely is that? I hope Dad manages to sell his house and come down for a long visit soon. I miss him too.

Blue

Things have been going pretty well at the Shams. The twins are settling in well at school. Kit was so excited to be elected to the SRC he was just about bursting with pride. Hannah and I have begun trying out routines on how to best manage the homework demands of Year 1 - spelling in particular. So far so good.
Saturday was in some ways a disaster - well return to extra curricular activities went famously but those electronic games and Kit are not mixing well at all. We had the most amazing tantrums - to the point were really he was hysterical and Phil and I were totally angry and frustrated. We are slowly working out the best approach so that he can enjoy his games but not be so overwhelmed by the whole thing. Our rules at the moment - no electronic devices Tues - Wed - the exception being if he wants the computer for something 'educational' such as Mathletics. That worked ok - hence it was the weekend where the wheels came off the wagon - honestly if we don't come up with a sound system that is workable - we will consider saying that the 'devices' are only for school holidays. Television is not counted as an electronic device in our house so Hannah has been largely unaffected by the debacles. Weekend strategy was a total failure on Sat - although the turning off of all devices regardless of pleading did meant hat once Kit had calmed down he and I had a wonderful afternoon while Phil and Hannah were at Rainbow CLub. Dinner was a Japanese chicken salad and I happened to have one of those sushi kits in the cupboard - I've never used them but it seemed a sensible Mother & Son activity. Kit was reluctant at first but soon forgot his computer angst and had a ball. Then we had a bath together - and I have those bath crayons in there at the moment so we each drew a Japanese garden. Well had just loved that - and after saying so a number of times he decreed that each Sat when the others are at swimming this is what we should do. I found a coffee table book of Japanese COurtyard Gardens and told him about the small Japanese garden that we had had at our old house. That night as we read one of his favourite kids books about Monet - and saw the bridges he painted it was declared that next week will be French night at our house. I am looking forward to it.
On Sunday it was decided to do some painting:
Hannah was proudest of her nail painting prowess
The actual painting well the painting on paper:
Did I mention that most of this occurred on her father's watch?
Hannah's fine motor skills are really coming along quite well - check out her little lego bus:

I could hardly believe it...

Last week I admit to feeling just a teensy weensy bit apprehensive. Phil and the twins were invited away on a 'dads and kids' weekend. A holiday at the beach - with a pool too - was available. Initially we discussed it and decided to just send Phil and Kit. Hannah has been exhausted after school and I wanted her to rest up. ALso I knew she'd probably demand more attention from Phil. Then the email came thorough - dinner out on Sat nights for the Mums. One of the dads was taking his Year 1 son and his 3 year old. Hannah wouldn't be the only one who needed a bit 'extra' supervision, plus there was a few kids going that I knew she really liked and played with - and so we decided to send her too. 6 dads, 14 kids later...Patiently I bit my lip waiting for instructions re food and what to pack. No word. I asked a few of the other Mums. The organisers wife (who is absolutely gorgeous) said that everyone was asking her about it - it was her husbands gig and she'd told him to get organised on it. She did tell us to pack QS sheets. Hmmm as Friday afternoon approached way too quickly I bought poppers, treats and heaps of fruit. Phil and I laughed and wondered how like Lord of the Flies the weekend might prove to be...Friday morning the 'organisation roster' was delivered. A few last minute bits and pieces were done and not long after 4pm I got the call to say that Phil and the kids were on their way.

I stopped off at JB HI FI on my way home from work - picked up a couple of classic chick flicks to enjoy and some take away for dinner. Relaxing at home - it was about 7.30 when I got the call.
Phil: No problem, everything here is fine. I just wanted to ask about Kit.
Me: Yes? What about Kit
Phil: Look he's fine, he's sitting here eating an iceblock.
Long pause.
Phil: He's hurt his head - on the bunks. It's stopped bleeding but he has a jagged cut on his head. It's an open wound. He's fine though. {You're fine aren't you mate? Kit it's mum on the phone...vague sounds of Kit saying my name in the background}
Phil: Do you think I should take him to a dr? he's fine. A (one of the dads) rang his sister - she's a nurse. SHe said it should be ok - just to boil some water and clean it.
Oh Yeah - did I say Lord of the Flies? What could I say? I told that man to get my son up to Gosford hospital asap and ring me as soon as he got there. Eventually he got in to see a dr who gave Kit 2 stitches in his scalp and told him he couldn't get it wet - no beach, no pool. In true Dad style - he went to the beach with everyone - and it got a 'little wet', then he had a blast in the water fight! It's not that his father doesn't parent him - it's just a different style isn't it? Anyway the twins had an absolute blast and came home very excited about their time away.

One of the questions phil asked me was what to do with hannah while he took her to the hospital. Leave her with A and D (the 2 other dads who were up there that night) I suggested. Which he did. These are dads we met at school last year. Lovely men. I knew they'd be fine with Hannah and they were. The next day Phil was out shopping (for dinner!) and the kids all went in the pool. Hannah wanted to too. When Phil got home A said that he'd not known whether it was alright or not but then decided 'why not?' and so little brat was happily playing around the edges of the pool when Phil got home. That's what I think is great about dads parenting - and although it may have resembled an episode of SUrvivor - survive they did. Survive and thrive in fact. Lol.
And on an even brighter note... I had driven out to mind my nieces and nephews while my SIL drove to the hospital thinking that her BIL was going to pass away that night. I got to her place about 10pm. She returned at 6am. He was still going. I wondered how on earth they were going to keep this up. Her husband (my BIL) had been up there at his brothers bedside for a long time. They wouldn't be able to keep it up. He was still only early 40s it may take days before his body finally stopped. I rang her that night. The hospital had spoken to them. He was going to be moved from ICU to palliative care. I wouldn't be needed to mind the kids again that night. I was relieved for their family.
On Sat morning I woke up alone in the house except for our dog. It was bliss. I pottered around and then thought I'd ring my SIL to see if she needed any help and to hear how Miles was going in palliative care...well MY LORD!!!!! Apparently they'd shifted him to a heart ward en route to palliative care. They were still treating him palliatively. At one point his morphine was less and he spoke and tried to sit up. He recognised his father and his friend who was there. He smiled at his dad's bad joke...How fantastic is that??? He didn't recognise his girlfriend but he has only known her for just on 1 year - and originally we were told that 'best case scenario' was that he will have memory loss of around 8-12 months. Well that is what it looks like now. They started treating him again - hiving him antibiotics for his chest infection. Managing his pain differently and putting him back on the ventilator. I still can't fathom it - it was such wonderful news. I know it's likely to be a hard road of rehab and he isn't out of the woods but FGS - his family are thinking about planning rehabilitation where just a few days ago they were discussing funeral arrangements. What a wonderful world we live in. I had a pep in my step all day just thinking of him. I haven't rung again - I want to give them time - but will ring again in a day or so to see how he is faring now. I am so happy for him and my nieces and nephews - they may just get to keep their Uncle Miles for many more years. I sure hope so.

Uncles

I come from a matriarchal family. I have few recollections of my uncles. Mum's brother was young and wild. I have a couple of happy memories of him - in my aunt and grandmother's house in Brisbane - teaching us kids to spit, giving us sips of his beer (XXXX of course!). We didn't see him that much - he was roaming, brawling and labouring with a bit of rodeo riding on the side. There is a photo of him that I love. It reminds me of the 70s cigarette advertisement - Marlboro Man.


Years later when my family were in Sydney and i was in my early teens we had a couple of Christmases on our own - just the 5 of us, Mum, Dad and the three girls. All our extended family were in Brisbane and country QLD. One year I can remember our excitement and joy when unexpectedly 2 people rocked up at our door. Yep, mum's brother had finally found himself a good woman and on the spur of the moment they decided to park the truck and visit us. (Family rumour has it that the QLD constabulary had suggested my uncle not return to QLD - I don't know how accurate that rumour is but he moved to Vic and then later to WA where he still lives - with that same 'good woman'. My eldest sister keeps in touch with them.) It felt great to have some other family around at Christmas. Mum was absolutely in her element.

Then there is the 'uncle' by marriage who is best forgotten really - except to say that I feel very lucky that my sisters and I never became his prey. None of that came out until years later but even as kids I don't have any strong memories of him. He was just 'around' although I love his exwife - Mum's sister to bits. And my cousins from that family are great too.

Then there was my godfather - husband to Dad's sister. I liked him a lot when I was younger. I remember waiting out the front of the family home in Sunnybank - watching down the street for an old fashioned figure wearing - I can't recall what they are called - you know - the old mens hats that have made a bit of a comeback this year? I bought Phil a black straw one in fact - but my uncle's were felt, checkered with a little feather in the side -a fedora? He also carried a tattered gladstone bag. He was a labourer and soon he was older and out of work. More recent memories are dominated by his absence. He was usually at the TAB putting on a bet, or drinking a few pints - he'd come home late for tea and not long before we had to leave. A merry sentimental tipsy old man who wanted to 'jitterbug'. He collapsed and died in his kitchen some years ago now. My cousin, his oldest son refused to let them take his body away and the police had to step in to help. My aunt misses him every day.

The twins have a couple of our close friends that they occasionally refer to as 'uncle' although technically they are not. It is more as a sign of respect and to show the close relationship these men have with our family. Their godfather for example who Hannah just loves. I never had that. Mum and Dad pretty much kept to themselves and the family when we were growing up.

They also have Phil's brother who lives in Melbourne and my SILs husband in Sydney. Then there are my sisters husbands who live in Brisbane. But one of the uncles who stand out in our family - is the uncle of my nieces and nephews - Miles. He is my brotherinlaw's brother. His brother married Phil's sister if that makes sense. He and his father have become regular features at family gatherings over the years and for a period of time he lived with my SIL and his brother and their kids.
He is a lovely man. The kids adore him. He plays with them, riles them up and brings them the most ridiculous presents which they just love. He is kind and gentle with them too - and also very sweet with Hannah and Kit. Just 2 weeks ago we had a family gathering to celebrate the January birthdays and he was there - as usual. Playing video games with the kids, chatting with the adults, swimming with the family. Then we went down south for a week at the beach. A few days after we got back - just last Thursday in fact, he was bushwalking and had a heart attack. His girlfriend knows CPR and kept him breathing - luckily a helicopter was there to rescue someone with a broken leg - once they were contacted they assisted Miles. But still he had been unconscious and not breathing for around 30 minutes - the damage was done. Tonight the plan is to take him off the respirators, and let him go. It is heartbreaking and shocking. So quickly - so unexpected. My poor SIL and BIL - they had so much on last year I was really hoping that 2011 would be a much better year for them - it isn't starting out that way at all.
So as I write this I say a prayer and pay tribute to a wonderful man who is a great uncle and who soon will not be with us. I hope his passing is painless and pray for strength for the family he leaves behind. God speed Uncle Miles and look after his loved ones left behind.

School starts

The twins went back to school today. the year 1 room is up a level - so an extra flight of stairs fro Hannah to deal with. The 2 Year 1 classes are also more separate so Kit is in a different class. Still I think they had a good day. Hannah looks exhausted. She told me she wanted to lie down and watch tv when I picked them up.

Random Acts in the Garden

I got yet another treat this week. By chance my MIL had a spare ticket to a matinee at the Ensemble. The ENsemble is a small theatre on the north side of town, near Luna Park. It was a one man show - by the 'dentist' from Mother and Son (Heaven help me I still can't remember the guy's name other than Harry!). Anyways - it was a lovely trail of vignettes - began with a speech from King Lear to his daughters, traversed the issues of racism, global warming and what is is to be an actor. In part of it he spoke of Dustin Hoffman in Tootsie - and so began my interest in DH - so on the trip home I decided that we'd have a Dustin Festival in the Dock. Do you know how many good movies that man has been in? I haven't seen them all, there are a number that I have heard of and not seen (like All the President's Men). So the first movies off the rink (depending upon availability at our local video store are :The Graduate, Kramer v Kramer, Tootsie and Death of a Salesman. THen I googled and the list at least doubled! We watched The Graduate last night - and it was great - better than I remembered - funny, arty, quirky... and it lead us to sit up late playing S&G records - which has to be a good thing. And then there is Willy and Biff, "a man is not a piece of fruit". I haven't seen that for years - certainly not since I had Hannah and learned about Danny Miller...
While I was at the theatre, Phil took the twins to a garden centre to revamp our vege patch. When I got home they planted their treasures...

Beach Holiday

We went down the south coast for a week. We'd rented a holiday house across the road from the beach with 2 other families.

The first day we arrived at our holiday house was a gloriously sunny afternoon. We hurried down to the beach. The twins raced into the water - all was peaceful and fresh. Phil was pulling Hannah along the waters edge on her new skim disk and she was loving it when she lost her balance and went face first into the hard sand. One of her top front baby teeth was knocked out. Once we realised we raced to get it back but the sea ate it up. Little brat was quite shaken so I carried her back to the house for the clean up. Her father was feeling very bad but it is just one of those things. The tooth net tot he lost one was wobbly. We hoped that it would not follow suit. It seemed as if it wasn't that wobbly - it would be touch and go...
Possums came up on deck at night searching for snacks

Kit learned to catch a wave on his boogieboard
Hannah found this green sack and turned into a caterpillar
This bream was caught and cooked for dinner
We saw dolphins swimming past
We went on bush walks and played at the park.


There was beach cricket, boy races the length of the beach, hermit crab races and noughts and crosses to play on the beach. Hannah made a million cakes and raced me into the waves over and over again...
Late one afternoon, a few hours after she'd had a chocolate icecream, Hannah lost another tooth...my girl is very gummy now - she comes at you mouth wide with excitement and al you can see is pink gum!
We played board games: family trivia; the Margaret and David Movie Game (I was Margaret!); Uno; Pairs (or memory game) Bookworm (on ipad/ipod); MarioKart (DS) and Hannah's favourite - Thomas Snakes and Ladders.
This is simply a random photo I took on our last day. One of the things that struck me watching the people on the beach and in the water was how colourful everything is at the beach. Maybe it is cos I am so used to living in the city where black is the go with everything colour preference. People at the beach had a rag tag collection of pieces - often mismatched but somehow they work against the tawny green backdrop of the national park and the sandy white colour of the beach and the waves. GThere were flashes of pink, green and orange, striped red and white beach umbrellas and yellow buckets and spades. A rainbow of colours...
When we got home I felt tired but refreshed - cleaned out the kitchen cupboards from top to bottom as I put away the leftover holiday goods. The kids played with their toys and pottered about. Finally I popped down to our local shops. Hannah had been asking to go tot he shops for quite a while so I took her with me. Sometimes I think the only reason she wants to come tot he shops with me is to have a sleep - and sleep she did. She was knackered!
The next day I went in search of the lego that Hannah had been demanding to buy with the cash from the tooth fairy. I couldn't afford the $100+ airplane that she wanted but I did find this seaplane. She and I made it together - it is a great little kit.

Fremantle Press : Books : Greater Expectations: Living with Down syndrome in the 21st century by Jan Gothard

Fremantle Press : Books : Greater Expectations: Living with Down syndrome in the 21st century by Jan Gothard

What a fantastic title for a book about people with Down Syndrome and their families in the 21st century. There is a sample chapter if you follow the link - which includes references to stalking (something that I can definitely relate to!lol) Can't wait to read it all....