And so I learn that fertility issues don't end once you fall pregnant. The waiting for each cycle to begin - all the while praying that it it won't - guess what! It doesn't stop once you have achieved your goal of pregnancy - or at least it does but only for 9 + a few months. So now here I am exactly where I was before but now with two - TWO children and still not satisfied!!! I can't believe it - it makes me crazy! How can that be? For so long I focussed on the outcome of falling pregnatn with no thought to the future - but I want more!!!!!!! It is as strong a desire - a call of the wild as ever before - but this time I feel so totally ridiculous. I have TWO absolutely beautiful children. We are in no way financially able to cope with any more - never mind the difficulties it presents - we had icsi for the twins after all. I wish I could feel some peace about this. I need to feel sme peace. I know the glass is half full - but where is the rest of it?