2014 - another new year brings....

Well, well, well....Hello and welcome back. If video killed the movie star, facebook killed this blog. Or did it? Today I had a message asking for a link to it. I had to reply that I had closed it about a year ago. The shams has been a great source of therapy and fun and creativity and sharing for years. Facebook is not the same. The focus on the minutae is greater. I don't get to grand stand and rant as much. Hey at least it isn't twitter! Still some things in this world require time and thoughtfulness. They can't be condensed so easily for a 50 - 100 word post. I am not that skilled a wordsmith!

And so not quite a year since my last post - I am back. If you happen to chance upon this blog I hope that you enter into my world with good faith and a generous spirit. Feel free to comment or say hi. Especially if you are on the 'outside' of the disability community  - I welcome you and hope that you embrace the opportunity to see another side, another view. If you are one of our community - then welcome! My journey is not yours, but when we share our experiences, our perspectives, we add to a ripple effect that I hope spreads an important story of acceptance and richness that is often overlooked or misunderstood. Please - leave a comment, say Hi. It's in our presence that we are strong. Sometimes being a witness is all we can do. To acknowledge reality as it is for another person. It may not be our reality but it doesn't mean it isn't real. So please - any comments - be kind! I don't mean to offend anyone and some things I have written I don't even necessarily agree with months or years later... but I did feel them at the time and I am honouring those emotions by leaving them up and (relatively) unedited.

This new era f blogging brings other dilemma's for me. Not only are my children older and more aware of their own right to privacy but an important change in my career - one that I'd like to explore on this blog is that of a special education teacher. I will have to play with what I can share on that. I'd love to reflect upon this change in the Shams but obviously there are many ethical aspects that I will also have to balance. We will see how it goes.

For now - an Update.
Twins - just started Year 4. Progress - very good! I am very pleased with both brats. Can't believe how much they have grown.
Work - I am a Special Education Teacher!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wow, that feels weird. I still have to get my head around it. For 20+ years I have been a HSIE (Social Science) teacher. Now I am learning to shift my professional identity in a slightly different direction. I sit in other people's classes - watching carefully to monitor how 'our' kids are going and constantly thinking about how I might help them more. I love it! But after being the show pony of hte classroom for years - it makes it hard to melt into the background - I am learning though. ANd just in case there's any doubt - the kids - they are awesome of course!! Big ugly teenagers. Hormonal, moody, atypical and delightful. Puzzles of people that I am privileged to get a glimpse of, to have the opportunity to get to know, just a little bit more.
Home - still living in the Dock and, drum roll please, about to put in tac claims for the last xx years! This is a milestone cos we have promised ourselves that once we did this we could start to look at architects and ideas for adding on a couple of rooms to our home in the Dock. How exciting is that??? A boys bathroom might no longer be just a dream - and maybe one day I'll have hot water in the kitchen :-)

Photo from above was taken this weekend. We took the kids down to the Shack - with 3 other families. It was a blast. The kids have all grown and are doing so well in their different ways. It was great to see everyone. I was particularly proud of my Kit. He just excelled. He is very sociable - and used those skills to involve the other kids in different games/activities. He got on with everyone and provided a great role model for the two younger kids who were also 'typical siblings' like him. He gave acceptance and understanding and friendship to all  - and I know he gained so much from it - not least the opportunity of deepening friendship with 6 other kids (including his own sister). It was a priceless experience for him. He is a natural leader. I must say that I also think he was the one who looked like he had the best time too!

And as for my precious girl, well she continues to delight. She had a blast but she also enjoyed getting home, to her own environment.

It's official - I don't care! YES I AM A PUSHY MUM!!

I have sent off my application to study my masters in special ed next year. So I have to accept that I am pushy. I am really looking forward to it although at the same time I am dreading the thought of having to fit more into a pretty packed day. At the moment I teach a program that is linked to Sydney Uni - so no, special ed is not even a small feature of our school. There may be students with dyslexia etc but as our focus is very much on academic preparation it is not like a typical high school where special ed training is always going to be useful.

I love teaching and over the years I have had various special needs students but usually in my home room or roll call class as the subjects I teach at senior level don't really lend themselves to many students with intellectual special needs. In starting this program I am really following an interest that has very much blossomed while watching Hannah learn.

I am so worried about how High School will be for her - after all I have taught in them for nearly 20 years - I know how tough they can be for 'weaker' students. SO there is a part of me that is doing this as a way of maintining some control over Hannah's ed. We hope that she will be able to attend a mainstream school but I am not absolutely committed to the idea - especially in later years it may be necessary (but difficult I know) to enrol her in a special school. There is a very good special school here and ultimately I just want what is going to be best for Hannah - in social, life and learning skills.

So if I really like it I and I ever go back to a typical High School I will have something to offer students and their families with special needs. Something that I fear I will have trouble finding myself yet something that I think is important - empathy and dedication. Too often I have seen teachers fight over who gets the top class (never the bottom), I have heard teachers say that 'so and so' shouldn't be here - they should be in a special school or in a special needs unit - as if that absolves us from responsibilty for these children. Caring for Hannah has given me a much clearer view on such things - a veiw I am eager to help infiltrate the school system with.

If I don't return to a regular school then I will still have a better ability to help support my beautiful girl - so I decided to go ahead and apply. As my mother said - if I wait unitl I have more time I'll probably never get there. I am looking forward to some intellectual stimulation too - in teaching it can be all too easy to say " I've taught this a million times" and never step outside and approach things from a different angle - it isn't a feeling I've ever had but I know there is a clear risk of it if I don't keep challenging myself.

Keeping focused on your students also helps because each of them are different - and the dynamics in each class are different too - even though the content that I am teaching has been pretty mcuh the same for the past 5 years. I want teachers with that focus to be teaching Hannah. All her learning now is done through play - it is FUN! I don't want that to change - I want her to enjoy learning.

So assuming I am accepted (which is pretty much a given) I hope that I can somehow juggle everything to fit it in. It is where my head is at the moment anyways so should be an interesting experience.


Modelling their new undies. In a half baked idea to assist with the toilet training initiative that is going to become priority number one in Jan I have bought the twins some undies. At the moment I put them on them about 30 minutes prior to their dinner and bath - the idea being that they will be more aware if they have an accident in them and this increased awareness may help them learn to request the toilet BEFOREhand. Also as we head into the holidays I have more time to mop the floors!